I'm a Celebrity recap: what happened on Saturday night? Celebrity Cyclone, Sam Quek leaves

Here's how it all went down...

Captain Blue Balls and the Celebrity Cyclone

If you thought the celebs were happy at being in the last four, you should have seen them when they were told they’d be doing infamous aquatic assault course the Celebrity Cyclone.

There was cheering, whooping and a happy dance from Scarlett, who reminded us what a huge fan of the show she’s always been.

“Me life’s complete,” she said. “Anyone who knows me, knows how much I bang on about this and I’m gonna be doing it in real life!”

Dreams can come true, people.

The celebs were transformed into caped superheroes The Above Average Four for the task, with Adam as Spider-Boy, Scarlett as The Purple Pimpernel, Sam as Golden Hockey Ninja and Joel as Captain Blue Balls, complete with a very suspicious bulge in his pants.

The Cyclone basically involves a massive fan (more like a windmill actually), some large Aussie men with huge hoses (ahem), loads of big bouncing balls (fnar) and, finally, a massive cascade of water combining to try to stop the campers getting four giant stars to the top of a very slippery slope.

There were plenty of amazing moments...

...but the highlight was quite possibly Joel running towards the finish, punching balls out of his way as he went, before the hose operators aimed straight for his own Blue Balls. Ouch.

And just seconds from the time running out, the celebs got all their giant stars in the right places and won the task.

Afterwards we got an insight into why Joel might have given himself the name Captain Blue Balls…

“It was great bringing back four stars,” he said. “It was great just holding on to a star that big. I think I’m gonna buy a big star and cuddle it when I go to sleep. I haven’t got anyone else to cuddle…”

Although he later revealed that it's not all doom and gloom when it comes to his love life.

Sorry ladies...

Kangaroo tail and chocolate cake

At a different point in their lives, kangaroo tail and chocolate cake might have sounded to some of the celebs like a combination they’d avoid at all costs. These days, that’s a four star meal to savour.

After winning the main course thanks to their efforts in the Cyclone, they had to work a little harder for dessert when they were told four pieces of cake had been hidden around the camp (because in I’m a Celebrity, even a reward has to be a task).

“We have never moved so fast in all our lives,” said Adam.

“We were all like sniffer dogs tonight,” agreed Scarlett.

“I think this is the happiest I’ve ever been in my life,” said Joel.

And that was after finding his slice of cake in the dunny…

Adam would do anything for a million quid

I’m not saying I couldn’t use a million quid but there are definitely limits to what I’d do for it. Not Adam, though. He’s ready to start cutting off body parts as soon as someone says the word so he can “live like Wayne Bridge” (he's clearly not aware that these days some footballers earn £1 million in just a month).

His opening gambit was a big toe (which as the other campers realised, is actually quite handy for both balance and looking good in a pair of flip-flops), then he offered up a little finger, and finally all his toes (to be fair, you would save money by buying smaller shoes).

“I think Adam would lop off his head for two million, not understanding that that’s pretty important for life,” said Joel.

“Adam, is there anything you wouldn’t do for a million pounds?”

“No.”

A bit like Doctor Evil, awakening after decades in suspended animation, Adam has clearly forgotten that inflation has happened and that a million would struggle to buy you a house in central London, let alone set you up with Champagne and caviar for life.

“I’d rather have a million laughs than a million pounds,” said Scarlett.

“That’s why we’re so different Scar,” Adam replied. “That’s why you’re gonna win this and I’m not.”

We’ll find out whether he’s right on Sunday night. But for now…

It's farewell to Sam

Yes, Olympic hockey hero Sam Quek was the last to go before Sunday night's endgame, meaning your three finalists are Adam, Joel and Scarlett.

Speaking to Ant and Dec over the traditionally glass of bubbly, Sam said the Jungle had been a surreal and humbling experience.

“My Olympic gold medal was just the pinnacle so far in my life and to end the year like this... Just getting on the show, let alone being in the top four, has just been surreal and I’m so humbled. It’s when you sit back and think actually outside the jungle is the world, is the UK, everybody’s calling on the app on the phone to vote for you and for me that is something I just can't comprehend and say thank you enough.”

And she also felt she'd done what she came to do.

“I came in here just to be myself, to get hockey on the map, to keep it up there and to inspire little girls and boys that this could be you one day.”

Job done.